Mindset Makeover Magic: 5 NLP Tools to Reshape Your Thinking and Change Your Life

NLP techniques that can reshape the way you think emily watson books

Neurolinguistic programming, often abbreviated as NLP, has become an increasingly popular approach to communication, personal development, and psychotherapy over the past few decades. But what exactly is NLP, and how can it be used to change your mindset and empower your life? This post will provide an overview of five NLP tools to reshape your thinking and change your life. 

What is Neurolinguistic Programming? 

Richard Bandler and John Grinder created neurolinguistic programming (NLP) in the 1970s. Its goal is to figure out how people take in information through their five senses and code it so that they can have the thoughts and feelings that control their actions. NLP thus looks at how neurological processes (neuro), language (linguistic), and learned behavioural patterns (programming) are linked.  

The programming is based on the idea that the words you use show a state of subjective experience that gives your actions meaning. NLP tries to change your inner programming by carefully using language and other forms of communication. This is done based on how you want to change your responses and behaviours and can help you make choices that are more in line with your goals and give you more power. NLP will also change your attitude, give you more self-confidence and help with negative self-talk. 

Benefits Of Using NLP Techniques for Mindset

Here are some potential benefits of using NLP techniques to change your mindset:

Increased self-awareness: NLP can help you identify and become aware of your habitual thought patterns, beliefs, and assumptions. Techniques allow you to consciously evaluate them rather than operate on autopilot.

New perspectives: NLP techniques like reframing can help you look at situations, problems, or yourself in a new light. They can help shift outdated or limiting mindsets and address issues such as self-doubt and negative thoughts.

Overcoming limiting beliefs:  Beliefs like “I’m not good enough” often hold us back. NLP can help identify and challenge those beliefs and change your mindset.

Improved communication skills: NLP focuses a lot on language patterns. Learning to communicate more purposefully and effectively can change how you relate to others.

Setting better goals:  NLP can help you set goals that align with your values and ensure your mindset supports achieving them.  Using NLP techniques will help you get more of what you want in life and change your habits.

Building positive thinking habits: NLP tools like anchoring, modelling, and establishing triggers can help condition more constructive thought patterns.

Expanding behavioural flexibility: A core idea in NLP is that having a larger map of behaviours, responses, and mindsets gives you more options to achieve your goals.

Five NLP Tools to Reshape Your Thinking and Change Your Life

Here are five common NLP tools to reshape your thinking and change your life:


Reframing involves changing the way you view a situation by putting a different mental frame around it. For example, reframing a problem as an opportunity. Here are a few ways to reframe the situation of feeling stuck in a career:

View it as an opportunity to explore and find work that is more meaningful. Reframe feeling stuck as having the freedom to make a change.

See it as an opportunity to identify your core values and find work that aligns with what’s important to you. Reframe feeling stuck as a chance for self-discovery.

Consider it a blessing that you’re not locked into a career you dislike. Reframe feeling stuck as keeping your options open.

Look at it as a learning experience about the types of work environments and roles that don’t resonate with you. Reframe feeling stuck as gaining helpful insight.

Regard it as a pivot point to take your career in a new direction that uses your strengths and interests. Reframe feeling stuck as a turning point in your life.

The important thing is to look at things positively and see how they are leading to something good, instead of just getting angry and giving up. Changing the way you think about something can help you see new options.


Anchoring is a simple technique used to associate a particular state of mind or mood with a sensory trigger. For example, using a specific word, gesture, or touch to induce a calm state.

Here are a few ways anchoring can be used in a relationship:

Create a daily ritual that anchors feelings of connection. This could be sharing a warm embrace when you wake up and before bed, or having a cup of tea together in the evening. The consistency of the ritual anchors the feelings.

Use a special word that anchors feelings of love. For example, decide on a word like “forever” that you say to each other when expressing heartfelt affection. The word takes on deeper meaning over time.

Associate a gesture like holding hands with feelings of comfort. Use it during difficult conversations or when one of you is stressed. The physical touch can induce calming feelings.

Develop inside jokes or special sayings that anchor shared joy and laughter. Telling the joke or saying the phrase reminds you of fun times.

Kiss or caress a certain spot on your partner’s body to anchor amorous feelings. Over time, kissing that spot may kindle desire.

Keep an object with special meaning in your home or on your person to anchor the significance of your relationship. Seeing or holding it reinforces the depth of your bond.

The key is consistency, and over time, the triggers begin to sink deep into your subconscious mind.


Modelling means watching someone who is good at a certain skill or mindset and copying their actions, strategies, and mindset.

The idea behind modelling is that you can learn best by watching, copying, and doing something over and over again. You need to look at how someone does something or shows a skill or mindset you want to have in order to break it down and learn how to do it yourself.

Effective modelling often involves finding a mentor or teacher who has mastered the skill you want to acquire. This could be a coach, instructor, or just someone in your life who models the skill exceptionally well. Observe them closely and take notes on their techniques, attitudes, problem-solving approaches, etc.

At first, try to repeat what you have seen in low-pressure settings. Regularly repeat and practice the behaviours that were modelled while asking your mentor and other people for feedback. These skills or ways of thinking will start to feel more natural over time.

Modelling is a good way to learn difficult social skills like how to lead, have confidence, be creative, be resilient, and more. It lets you skip the process of trial and error by using someone else’s knowledge. 

Do you, for example, want to become more mindful? Then model an expert in that field.

Combining modelling with other ways to learn, like reading, classroom instruction, role-playing, and self-reflection, can help you master a goal faster.

Parts integration

Parts integration resolves your inner conflicts by identifying and integrating different aspects of yourself into alignment. For example, aligning a part that is fearful with a part that is courageous. This technique is especially helpful when you want to achieve a specific goal.

Parts integration is thus a process in psychotherapy that involves identifying the different sub-personalities, inner parts, or schemas that make up your overall personality. These parts often have conflicting goals, emotions, or views of oneself or the world.

For example, as mentioned you may have a part that is very fearful or avoidant and another part that is courageous and wants to take action. Or one part may be very self-critical while another part cares deeply about the self.

Parts integration aims to help these conflicting parts understand each other, communicate, and become more aligned. The process recognises that these inner parts all belong to the same self, even if they are in conflict. Through dialogue and understanding, the goal is to integrate them into a more coherent whole.

How can you use this technique?

  • Identify the different parts of yourself associated with a particular goal and their positive intentions. Giving them names can help personify them.
  • Identify those parts of yourself that are not aligned with this goal
  • Establish which parts are at odds with each other.
  • Separate yourself from parts of the inner conflict.
  • Facilitate communication between these parts. Allow them to share their perspectives and needs.
  • Look for positive intent in every part. Find the valid truth in each part to understand the origins of each part and how it served a purpose.
  • Then negotiate and find compromises between these different parts. Integrate these parts; see it happen visually. One hand can be the parts with positive intentions and your other hand those parts with conflicting ideas.  Bring your hands together.

Calming Down

Here are two simple NLP techniques to help calm you down whenever you need it:

1. Take a deep breath in through your nose, counting to 5 in your head. Feel your lungs fill up with air.

2. Hold the breath for 2 counts.

3. Slowly exhale through your mouth, counting to 5 again. Release all the air from your lungs.

4. Repeat steps 1–3 three more times, breathing deeply and slowly. Focus on your breathing.

5. Now bring your awareness to your body. Notice any tension or tightness. Concentrate on relaxing each part of your body, starting with your feet and moving up. Release any tension.

6. Bring your awareness back to your breathing. Take a few more slow, deep breaths. Feel yourself becoming more and more relaxed and calm with each exhale.

7. Now bring up a peaceful image in your mind—somewhere you feel safe, calm, and relaxed. It could be a beach, forest, your bedroom, etc. Imagine yourself in this peaceful place, feeling calm and relaxed.

8. Whenever you notice your mind wandering, gently bring your attention back to your breathing and the peaceful image.

9. Finish by taking one more deep breath.

You can also do the following:

  • Close your eyes and lie down.
  • What colour makes you feel calm?
  • Picture a bucket of peace in any colour you want sitting in front of you.
  • Think about being able to paint yourself this colour over time. From the tips of your toes to the top of your head, work your way up your foot, shins, and legs.
  • If you want to, you can breathe calmly and make your exhale longer than your inhale. Your heart rate will go down.

Frequently Asked Questions About NLP Tools to Reshape Your Thinking and Change Your Life

What is NLP and how can it change your life?

NLP, or Neuro-Linguistic Programming, is a powerful technique that can change the way you think and behave. By using various tools and strategies, NLP helps you reprogram your mind and overcome limitations to achieve personal growth and success.

How can NLP help me achieve my goals and dreams?

NLP provides techniques that can help you align your thoughts, beliefs, and actions with your goals and dreams. It allows you to unleash your full potential by removing self-imposed limitations and empowering you to take actions towards what you truly desire.

Can NLP improve my self-confidence and attitude towards myself?

Yes, NLP can significantly improve your self-confidence by helping you relearn positive self-talk and develop a positive attitude towards yourself. Through techniques such as positive affirmations and visualization, NLP can rewire your mind to focus on your strengths and capabilities.

What are some practical applications of NLP in everyday life?

NLP can be applied in various aspects of life, including personal relationships, career growth, and self-development. It can help you improve your communication skills, enhance your decision-making abilities, and build better rapport with others. Try the five techniques that I shared in this post as a start.

How can NLP help me with my career?

NLP can be a valuable tool in your career journey. It can help you change your attitude towards work, develop a growth mindset, and enhance your leadership skills. By applying NLP techniques, you can overcome obstacles, increase your productivity, and achieve greater success in your professional life.

Is there a specific book you recommend to learn more about NLP?

Yes, a great book to start with is NLP The New Technology of Achievement by Steve Andreas.

How can NLP enhance my personal growth?

NLP provides tools and strategies to help you identify and overcome limiting beliefs.

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