Letting Go of Anger Toward Someone: Finding Peace And Releasing Resentment

Woman releasing anger Emily Watson Books

Letting go of anger toward someone is important if you want to find inner peace.  In this post, you will learn how to let go of anger and resentment with some useful techniques.

Anger is an emotion that can be both helpful and harmful, depending on how it is handled and shown. It can help you stand up for yourself, but if you don’t handle it right, it can also cause long-term problems. Always being filled with feelings of anger and resentment, or holding a grudge can affect your health and inner peace.

Identifying Your Anger

At its most basic, anger is a feeling you have when you feel threatened or wronged in some way. It’s usually a sign that something is wrong or that your personal or professional relationships are out of balance. It could start with a need for power or control, or with a sense of being wronged or betrayed.

Anger is a complicated feeling that can be hard to figure out. Other emotions like frustration, hurt, and disappointment frequently accompany this feeling. All of these feelings can be hard to tell apart from each other, which can make it hard to figure out where your anger is coming from.

Although anger can feel overwhelming, it is an important emotion to acknowledge and work through. Being aware of your anger is the first step to dealing with it in a productive manner. So, how can you identify your anger and its associated emotions?

The first step to identifying anger is to pay attention to your body. Anger can manifest itself in physical sensations such as a racing heart, increased body temperature, and tense muscles. By paying attention to your body, you can identify when you are becoming angry and adjust your behaviour accordingly.

Another method for identifying anger is to look for related actions and thoughts. If you find yourself feeling irritable or resentful, these could be signs of anger. Similarly, if you find yourself avoiding someone or having negative thoughts about them, these too could be indications of anger.

There are some people who struggle to identify their anger, even when it is very present. This could be due to a variety of reasons, such as unresolved childhood trauma, a lack of proper emotional education, or a fear of feeling angry. If you are unable to identify your own anger, it is important to seek help from a professional who can help you process and manage your emotions.

Identifying your anger is the first step to managing it in a healthy way. By being aware of and understanding your anger, you can start to work through your emotions and begin the process of releasing your anger towards someone.

 What Are The Benefits Of Releasing Your Anger Toward Someone?

Letting go of anger towards someone can help free you from the pain and suffering of holding onto such a destructive emotion. You will feel worse over time and overlook the good things in your life.

The first and most important benefit of letting go of anger is that it makes you feel better. When you let go of your anger, you can get past the hurtful feelings, feel like you’re free and have peace of mind. This can be a big relief because you don’t have to hold on to the bad feelings that come with being angry. This can also help you get along better with other people since you won’t be carrying around the anger that comes from holding on to this feeling.

Releasing anger also enables you to take a step back and look at the situation objectively. This can give you valuable insight into the situation and help you understand why it happened in the first place. This may provide you with the opportunity to learn from your mistakes, helping you grow and develop as individuals.

 In addition, releasing anger can help reduce stress and anxiety. When you  are holding onto your anger, you can become stressed and overwhelmed by the situation. This can have a negative effect on your mental and physical health, leading to further issues. By letting go of your anger, you can free yourself from the stress and start to feel better.

Another benefit of your decision to let go of anger is the emotional insight it brings. When you take the time to reflect on your feelings and examine why you are so angry, you can start to gain an understanding of your emotions. This can provide you with a better perspective on the situation and also give you the opportunity to express your feelings in a healthy way.

Most importantly, releasing anger can help you focus on more positive aspects of your life. By letting go of this emotion, you can start to be grateful for your experiences and focus on the joys of life. This can help you move on from the hurtful situation and make you more appreciative of the moments you have. 

Understanding the Cause of Your Anger And Resentment

 People often find themselves feeling angry toward someone else, even when they don’t know why. Understanding the cause of your anger is the key to letting it go. Once you know  the source of your anger, you can begin to take steps to manage it and eventually release it.

 When you become aware that you are angry, the first thing to do is to take a step back and observe the emotion. Ask yourself why you are feeling the way you do. Are you feeling resentful, hurt, or betrayed? Is someone taking advantage of you or failing to meet expectations?

Once you have identified the emotion behind your anger, you can begin to think about the cause. What is the underlying issue that is making you angry? Is it a misunderstanding, a pattern of behaviour, or a feeling of betrayal? Try to be as specific as possible.

 Once you understand why you feel the way you do, you can begin to make an effort to change your feelings. Think about the situation objectively. Is it really as bad as you think it is? Is there anything that you can do to improve the situation?

At the same time, be mindful of the fact that some things cannot be changed. You need to accept that some people and situations are beyond your control. You cannot control how someone else acts, nor can you undo past mistakes. What you can do is focus on how you feel and the steps you can take to manage your anger.

Take the time to think about your own behaviour. How have you contributed to the problem? Are there any changes that you can make to help resolve the situation? Taking responsibility for your own actions can be an important step in understanding why you are feeling angry.

 Learning to identify and understand the cause of your anger is the first step towards managing it and eventually letting it go. Once you have identified the source, you can start to take the appropriate steps to manage your feelings. This may include learning new coping strategies, such as deep breathing or meditation, or talking to a trusted friend or counsellor. With time and effort, you can learn to manage your anger and move on.

Is It Possible To Let Go Of Anger Toward Someone?

Anger is a normal emotion that can be useful, but when it gets out of hand or goes in the wrong direction, it can cause problems in your relationships and daily life. It can be hard to stop being angry at someone, but it is possible with the right mindset and techniques. 

It can be hard to accept what’s happened in the past, but it’s important to move on and focus on what’s happening now. Trying to find the good in a bad situation and thinking about what you have learned from it can help you feel less angry. Setting limits and having clear conversations with yourself and the other person are important steps in letting go of anger. It can be hard to let go of anger, but it is possible if you have the right tools.   

How Can You Control Your Negative Feelings About Someone In Their Presence?

It can be hard to keep negative feelings about someone in check when they are around, but with practice and the right attitude, it is possible to keep your emotions in check. One way to do this is to try to understand and feel empathy for the other person.

By trying to see things from their point of view, you may be able to understand their actions and why they did them, which can help you feel less angry. Remind yourself that everyone has flaws and struggles and that holding on to anger is bad for your own health. Instead, try to develop kindness and forgiveness, knowing that anger and resentment only make things worse.

Another useful strategy is to practise self-awareness and mindfulness when you are with the person who makes you feel angry. You can get a better handle on your feelings if you stay in the moment and watch how you respond. When you start to have negative thoughts or feelings, take a deep breath and decide to act in a calm and collected way. Taking deep breaths or silently repeating positive statements such as “I am enough” can help you change your focus and feel more at peace with yourself. Remember that you can choose how you feel. If you choose to let go of negativity, you can create a more peaceful environment and protect your own emotional health.

Techniques To Use To Manage Your Anger Toward Someone 

Managing your anger toward someone can be a difficult process, but there are techniques that can help.  These techniques will also be helpful when the other person is screaming at you or insulting you.

While it is important to express your feelings about how you are being treated, that does not necessarily mean that you have to take out your anger on them too. Here are some techniques you can use to manage your anger  when you are hurt by someone’s behaviour:

#Mindful Breathing 

The first technique is to practise mindful breathing. Mindful breathing is a great way to calm down and refocus on the present moment. You can do this by simply breathing in for four counts and then exhaling for four counts, while paying attention to your breath. This can help reduce your heart rate and provide a sense of relaxation.

 #Positive Self-Talk

Another technique is to practise positive self-talk. Negative thoughts can often fuel our anger, so it is important to practise positive self-talk to help reframe our thoughts. This can help keep us grounded and focus on the positive aspects of the situation.

It is also important to practise self-care to manage our anger. Self-care can take the form of engaging in activities that help reduce stress and anxiety, such as exercise, yoga, or meditation. Taking time for yourself can also help you manage your anger.

#Cognitive Restructuring 

It is also important to practise cognitive restructuring. This means looking at the situation objectively and reframing the way you think about it. This can help reduce feelings of anger and see the situation from a different perspective.

#Ho’oponopono Method

The Ho’oponopono method is a powerful forgiveness practice that originates in Hawaii. The practice involves repeating the following four phrases: “I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.” Here’s how you can use this method to let go of anger towards someone:

1. Bring to mind the person you’re angry with and focus on your feelings of anger towards them.

2. Repeat the four phrases of Ho’oponopono: “I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.”

3. Visualise the person you’re angry with and imagine sending them love and positive energy.

4. Keep repeating the phrases and visualising positive energy until you feel a sense of peace and release.

Forgiveness is a process, and it may take time to fully let go of your anger toward someone. But with consistent practice, Ho’oponopono can help you release negative emotions and cultivate a sense of inner peace.


Visualisation can also help you let go of anger toward someone.  Do the following:

1. Find a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed. Sit or lie down comfortably.

2. Bring the person you’re angry with to mind and imagine them standing in front of you.

3. Take a few deep breaths and allow yourself to feel your anger towards them.

4. Now, imagine yourself as a child standing in front of them. Look at them with the innocent eyes of a child.

5. Say to the person: “I forgive you, and I release you from any negative energy I have been holding onto. I send you love and light.”

6. Imagine a bright, warm light surrounding both you and the person you are forgiving. Allow this light to fill you with a sense of peace and release.

7. Repeat these steps as often as necessary until you feel a sense of peace toward the person.

Remember, forgiveness is a journey, and it may take time to fully let go of your anger. But with practice and patience, you can learn to release negative emotions and cultivate a sense of inner peace.

#The Mirror Technique

Use the mirror technique when someone is yelling at you and insulting you. Think of yourself as a mirror that reflects back what the other person says without taking it in. You can also imagine that there is an imaginary wall between you and the other person. Their bad energy and insults will bounce off the wall and not hurt you.

#Embrace Compassion

Instead of getting angry or defensive, try to have a compassionate attitude toward the person. Be aware that their actions may be a result of their own pain, a sense of insecurity, or unsolved issues. Even if they say something hurtful, picture yourself sending them thoughts of understanding, kindness, and even forgiveness.

 #Create A Mental Shield

Imagine yourself surrounded by an invisible shield that protects you from the person’s verbal attacks. Imagine the shield as impenetrable, allowing their insults to bounce off harmlessly. This visualisation can help you feel more resilient and less affected by their hurtful words.

#Practise Detached Observation

Think of yourself as a person watching the scene from the outside, like you would if you were watching a movie or play. Watch the person’s actions, words, and feelings without getting involved or letting them affect you. This mental distance can help you keep your mind clear and calm.

#Focus on Self-Affirmation

Repeat positive things about yourself in your head to counteract the effect of their insults. Remind yourself of your value, your skills, and the good things about you. This technique can help you feel better about yourself and counteract any negative thoughts that the person’s actions have given you.

Even though these methods are meant to help you deal with your own feelings and stay healthy in tough situations, if the other person’s behaviour becomes physically threatening or abusive, put your safety first and call the police.

How Can You Learn to Accept What Happened And Move Forward?

Accepting what happened is not always easy, but it is an important step in getting over the mental pain. It can be hard to accept a situation or person, but it’s important to do so if you want to stay emotionally healthy and be able to move on from the bad feelings that come with anger.

It is important to accept that it is out of your control. It is important to understand that you cannot change the past and that you need to accept the situation for what it is. This can be a difficult concept to come to terms with, but it is an important step in the process of releasing anger.

It’s also important to know that the person you’re angry at is not to blame for your feelings. It’s easy to say that someone else is to blame for your anger, but it’s important to understand that you are in charge of your own feelings. Even if someone has hurt you, you need to take responsibility for your feelings and realise they are yours.  

To move forward, you need to pay attention to the present. It’s easy to get stuck in the past and the pain it caused, but it’s important to keep your attention on the present and how you can make things better. Taking steps to make your situation better can help you get over your anger.

Also, you should forgive people who have hurt you. Forgiveness isn’t always easy to understand, and it’s important to know that it doesn’t mean you have to excuse someone’s acts or forget what happened. Rather, it can mean realising that you are in charge of your own feelings and can choose to let go of anger and hatred towards the person or situation.

Finally, it is important to practise self-care and make an effort to take care of your emotional and physical health. Taking time to relax and spend time with friends and family can be a helpful way to process your emotions and learn to move on from anger.

Frequently Asked Questions About Letting Go Of Anger Toward Someone

Why do I take my anger out on someone I love?

Taking out your anger on someone you love is a common behaviour. This might happen because you feel comfortable expressing your emotions with them, or because you expect them to understand your feelings. However, it’s important to remember that taking your anger out on someone else is not an effective way to deal with your emotions.

Can you forgive someone and still be angry?

Yes, it’s possible to forgive someone and still feel angry. Forgiveness is a process that involves letting go of resentment and bitterness towards the person who hurt you. However, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you automatically stop feeling angry. Anger is a natural emotion, and it can take time to process and work through. The important thing is to acknowledge and validate your feelings while still choosing to forgive the person who hurt you. It’s a process that takes time and effort, but it can help you find peace and move forward in a positive way.

How do you forgive someone who hurt you emotionally?

Forgiving someone who has hurt you emotionally can be a difficult process, but it’s important for your own emotional wellbeing and personal growth. Here are some steps you can take to forgive someone who has hurt you emotionally:
1. Acknowledge and validate your feelings: Allow yourself to feel all the emotions that come up, such as anger, sadness, or frustration. It’s essential to acknowledge and accept your emotions before moving forward.
2. Try to understand the other person’s perspective: Take a step back and try to see the situation from the other person’s perspective. This doesn’t mean that you need to excuse their behavior, but it can help you understand why they acted the way they did.
3. Communicate your feelings: If possible, try to communicate your feelings to the person who hurt you in a calm and respectful manner. This can help you express your emotions and feel heard.
4. Make a conscious decision to forgive: Forgiveness is a choice that you make for yourself. It doesn’t mean that you forget what happened, but it means that you choose to let go of the resentment and bitterness towards the person who hurt you.
5. Practice self-care: Forgiving someone who has hurt you emotionally can be a draining process. Make sure to prioritise self-care, such as practicing mindfulness, journaling, or seeking professional help if needed.
Forgiveness is a process, and it may take time and effort to fully forgive someone who has hurt you emotionally. However, the benefits of forgiveness are significant and can lead to emotional healing and growth.

You love them to pieces, but they're not a good fit. They're too angry and verbally abusive. You're caught between a rock and a hard place, but you cannot leave the relationship.

One of the most common reasons people decide to stay in a verbally abusive relationship is because they are afraid of the pain that leaving might bring. They also fear the unknown and want to protect themselves and their family from potential hurt and financial suffering.

Do you want to regain control of your life and get back on the right track despite being in such a relationship?

If you've lived with an anger-addicted person for a while, this book is for you. The book will help you learn to detach from this relationship and find your inner peace with some mindset techniques. It's about surviving and detaching from this type of relationship without emotion-scarring you or your loved ones.





Letting go of anger toward someone can be difficult, may take weeks and will require conscious effort and time, but it is possible.

Releasing your anger towards someone and learning to forgive them can have powerful benefits in your life. You can free yourself from the burden of negative emotions, focus on the good, become more aware of your reactions to other people, and move forward with greater peace and understanding. 

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

error: Not allowed!